Monday, September 17, 2007

Moving On...

"I've been living with a shadow overhead
I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed
I've been lonely for so long
Trapped in the past, I just can't seem to move on"

Part of the lyrics from the song Way Back Into Love from the movie Music and Lyrics.

To those who are happily in love, you can skip this post for it's about sadness, it's about closure, it's about moving on, it's for those souls who are still lost in the past. But if you do break up someday, which of course I would never ever wish upon you I swear to God, you could return back to read this post.

Toughest things in life:

5) Being stuck in the company of a friend with bad breath.
4) Plucking the courage to talk to the god damn prettiest girl in the pub only to find out she is actually a he.
3) Having to hear yourself being christened another name when trying to defy the law of mathematics by making two become one.
2) Having to break up with someone.
1) The ultimate test of a man, or a woman, Moving On.

To love someone and not have this love reciprocated is one's worst nightmare, it is pain beyond pain, pain beyond description. Would we ever wish it on anybody? (Hmm.. Perhaps on our worst enemies) But I believe most people wouldn't. Then all the more we wouldn't wish it to befall on the very one whom we so deeply loved, the one who came closest to your meaning of perfect.

So if you truly love that someone, be glad that he/she was able to escape this horrible fate and that you were the one who saved him/her from it. Be glad that he/she was spared the torture of seeing you together happily with another person. Be glad that he/she needn't be crying every night, struggling to face life everyday, having to spend V day and Christmas Eve alone, if you truly love him/her, be glad for all these.

Now, I know not the meaning of true love, but I learned from the movies that it is something to do with wishing your beloved to be happy, always happy, even if he/she chooses not to be with you. I have no idea whether such thing exists in this world and if it does, I say there is still hope for the world.

The thing is, if your beloved chooses to be with another, then most probably it means he/she for this moment is happier with another. According to the movies' definition of true love, I suppose all we can do is wish him/her the best and move on. Be happy for she is happy and that is all that matters, at least that's what the movies all say.

So if you truly love him/her, let him/her go.

Now all we can do is listen to the song by the Corrs, 'Everybody hurts' and at the end of the song, when we finish hurting, we move on. It's not easy, in fact it's so god damn painful but no one ever said life was easy.

12 comments:

ah boon said...

'The thing is, if your beloved chooses to be with another, then most probably it means he/she for this moment is happier with another. '

I like this... I am experiencing something now and it is real hard to move on.

Probably I am not being truthful, str forward to him. Maybe, he is juz waiting for me to hint something. Coz, right from the start, I let him go first.

oh wells... doesnt know wat i am saying.. bt time to move on

Sui Generis said...

Hmm... It's very complex, more complex than complex numbers and matrix. Hope everything's well for you...

Kay said...

Everybody hurts is orginally by R.E.M...

Haha... Just so you know...

Sui Generis said...

Haha, of cos i noe la, but thks anyway...

Kay said...

Well, truly, moving on is not easy... But for most, I believe it just means you have to pick up more hobbies/interests and use up all the spare time you have... Loneliness is hard to bear but if you use your time wisely and doing fulfilling things with it, the less likely you are to regret...

The worst thing to a break up is to hide in your room and cry on for days (for ladies) and lick your imaginary wounds (for guys)... What do you benefit from such an act? I'm not saying that you can't be sorry for yourself... Perhaps one day of sorry is enough? Turn this sense of helplessness into power that you arm yourself to do things that benefits you, the people around you, or this world... Surely this is a better option...

Instead of cooping up at home, get out. Instead of crying, smile. Instead of feeling sorry, thank him/her for giving you the opportunity AND the choice to meet someone else - someone who has a different view, different thoughts and definitely, someone who thinks you are worth it. And after this, thank yourself for bringing yourself out of this crap place of misery and helplessness. It's his/her loss anyway...

PS: This author has just moved on from a relationship and is basing this on her own private experience. She's now infatuated with another who doesn't know. She has also been through all the "toughest things in life" that was mentioned...

Song Queen~ said...

Nice song from music & lyrics..

Sui Generis said...

Dear Kay,

'She has also been through all the "toughest things in life" that was mentioned...'

'4) Plucking the courage to talk to the god damn prettiest girl in the pub only to find out she is actually a he.'

Haha, I wonder how you ever encountered tough thing number 4?

Sui Generis said...

To Song Queen,

Haha, thank you for your compliment on the song. Being THE 'Song Queen', your compliment must indeed carry tons of weight. I'd like to play the song on the blog but I've no idea how to, seriously, I'm very sick of the 'Chasing Cars' song already!

Kay said...

When you try approaching a woman in a club and she turned out to be him?

Why not??

I hit on both sexes... Heh... :P

Song Queen~ said...

Um haha i think first of all u can go and sign up an account at:
http://geocities.yahoo.com/ps/learn2/HowItWorks4_Free.html

Then u can upload ur song using the File Manager.. But the song needs to be 5MB or less.. And one more thing, the song title or name cannot have space in btw..

For eg if its "Way Back Into Love", u would have to change it to "waybackintolove" before it can be uploaded.. But the easiest is to copy n paste the song onto ur desktop n juz type love, a shortform or sth.. Simpler.. =P

Next u put this into ur blog template.. Add the "<" to the beginning of the code and ">" at the end of it..

embed src="http://us.share.geocities.com/*ur geocities ID name*/love.wma" AUTOSTART="TRUE" LOOP="TRUE" width="0%" height="0%"

Sry im not adding in cuz i tried and i got the "Your HTML cannot be accepted" msg.. So trying out this mtd to see if it works..

The "wma" part, u can change it to mp3 if its an mp3 file.. Haha try it out and see if it works.. Good Luck~ =)

ape said...

一些人会选择忙碌去让自己摆脱寂寞和悲伤,我却觉得有时候留一份寂寞给生命,让生命可以开阔灵动起来。其实寂寞并不意味着愁苦,寂寞意味着一段静下来的时光。独自面对寂寞,有可能会看到不一样的境界呢。Sorry for those who cannot understand my Chinese here.

Sui Generis said...

Hmm.. I think chinese is indeed an art, it makes the cheem cheemer. But yes Ape, I totally agree with you. Only when one is alone then can one 'tame' oneself, listen to oneself, understand oneself.

Aristotle once said, "Thinking is the soul talking to ourselves.", or something like that. So ya, sometimes lonliness is good, it's when we can learn to be at peace with ourselves and truly learn to learn who we actually are, and thus see things in a new light....